She is a new mom. Actress and filmmaker Busisiwe Mtshali says after having a baby, many changes to her body have made her reflect on appearance issues and being self-conscious.

She recently shared pictures of her petite boy in a swimsuit. "The other day I was requested to submit these pictures along with my self-tapes for a casting. The role was that of a swimmer, so it was important to attach these photographs for those within the casting/directing department to see what one would look like in a swimsuit," she says. "After taking these pictures I, for the longest time, contemplated not even submitting my tape because I couldn't handle the anxiety that came with the level of vulnerability this particular character would require from me. Not from an emotional standpoint but a physical one."

Bucee admits that pregnancy came with changes. "You see as incredible as pregnancy is, the body goes through the most and something I was never ready for was the stretched skin that would remain long after giving birth," she says. "I thought snapping back would mean my body going back to its former glory, cinched, and snatched just like before. But instead, I went from having a six-pack to having a kangaroo pouch."

Bucee says for the first time in her life her stomach has not remained flat. ?I look at my stomach and I have loose, stretched skin. Folds of flesh that I can hold between my fingers and sometimes it even shrivels,? she says. ?Like It's there, unavoidable and concealable. I found myself thinking about what would happen should I get on set and need to show up in a swimsuit as my best and most confident self while riddled with these new insecurities. I've never had to face it. I didn't know how I would navigate pushing past the vulnerability."

SELF CONSCIOUS

The Kedibone, Thandeka's Diar, and Commandos actress says it was a strange realisation because for the first time she realised she was embarrassed by what her body looked like in person and worried about what people would say or think. ?This has never been a thing for me, so this was hard,? she says. ?Some days are still hard. When I feel brave enough to wear a crop top I cringe when someone looks at my mid but you know what, I continue to wear them regardless, because also this is the only body I have, that's done a miraculous thing and I will celebrate this new body and embrace her,? she adds. ?I'm sharing this not for affirmations or anything but just to remind anyone struggling with any insecurities that it's okay to have them but don't let them hold you hostage in your thoughts and life. Unfortunately, the worry and the self-loathing won't make it go away, so try to lean into loving yourself irrespective. Life is short, we live on borrowed time,